It's been a long time since I posted in this blog.It's been a longer time since I foolishly and unconsciously pushed people away from me.It's given me time to sort things out,keeping my distance.Or so I thought.Once you start getting into the world again,the confusion starts all over again.I guess it's just like a long run.Either you walk and you get nowhere after a long time,but you don't feel the pain and the brainscrambling that comes with the sprinting,or you sprint and you get somewhere,dealing with the pain with pure determination.Never is a fixed answer.

There are many things I learnt in the Long Long Time,but only a few sure facts.First,and most obviously and certainly,standing far away to gain perspective is never a solution.As much as you understand everything that's happening for the moment when you stand far away,you can't do anything about it.As you move closer again,the perspective you gained probably doesn't account for all that much because EVERYTHING'S CHANGED.Even though I don't like getting blindsided by life,I'm gonna have to do it all over again.Again, and again.Because distancing yourself never works.

Second,I realized after reading people's blogs and facebook pages,I regret not being able to play a part in many people's lives,the result of my self-distancing.For a brief moment,I was Dead to the World.I saw many New Things happening.I missed those new things happening.I played truant and now I'm behind everyone in class.I missed the important people whom some people met,I missed the Events that changed many people in many ways.I missed the Subtle Processes that I would have so appreciated otherwise,that changed those important people.Reunions,meetings,breakups,everything.What I would give to have a part in the Events.

Third,details matter.This really obvious fact came to me because I couldn't do my C4 correctly.Gosh.Takes a maths test to wake me up to something I'd known subconsciously for 18 years but never practiced.Don't Skip Steps.Simple way to score in C4.Or p/4 becomes 16y somehow and you're totally screwed.Worse,skipping steps in Life.Ignoring what you don't understand or don't want to understand or find a waste of time means you'll keep going in circles in neatly drawn Venn diagrams,never expanding the blurred edges.
(Your life)⊆(what it could be),except you won't realize that,because (what you know about what your life could be)⊆(what it could be) in equal proportions.This is true for everyone anyway.

Lastly,and most importantly.I love writing.And I intend to keep it that way.

At times I remember that I need.
At times I don't.
At times I remember that I want.
But for the most I forget.
But today is an exception
And I'll try to make it last.
I'll make it last.

I don't need to be a psychic
So long as I can see what's in your mind.
Do you see what I see?xD

I won't forget.

At the crossroads in life,everyone says to themselves that they won't forget the important people they part with in life.Save yourself and your friends a teary-eyed farewell,you say.Save the embarrassment,save the tears,save the slushy emotions for another day.That's what you say.

But after a while,you realize that a person can only have this many important things in life.It's not that we give up things that are important to us as we go along,we give up their importance to us.It's like giving up a puppy for adoption.

Day 1:Puppy arrives.Puppy is named Stitch!YAY!

Day 2-15:You spend two whole weeks with Stitch.Stitch tears up a bear,which you will keep with you forever to remind you of Stitch.Stitch teaches you some very important lessons in life blah blah blah.BUT...there's always a but:

Day 16:Stitch has to go tomorrow.Scream,shout,anything he has to go.=( T.T >.< gone.

So..what's the best option to most people?Easy.They say to themselves "I'm just giving a dog away." Either after giving the dog away (SUCKERS) or before( EVEN BIGGER SUCKERS).

The name of the dog is how important it is because it represents how personal it is to you.
The dog is something you have to give up.
Do you get it?

I wish humans had more space for feeling and emotion.=(

And ALL I GOT was a piece of paper saying

"You worked hard but not hard enough"

I'm severely distracted.What happens when you lose purpose is worse than when you lose motivation.So you don't have it so bad yet haha.Keep the purpose even if the motivation goes away.It'll come back.

I need a place to rest my mind.I need a place to think a lot of things through without losing touch with the real world.I need a place where I can find some inspiration.I need a place to play the piano for half the day without having to consider the plight of my listeners.I need a place where time can stop when someone smiles.I need a place where time flows backwards and forwards in an erratic manner.Somewhere where my confused mind will fit in,a universe just as confused.Somewhere where I can look into the surface of the water and see anything I want to see.Somewhere where eating too much cheesecake doesn't make you feel like puking.Somewhere I can wake up and believe that today is gonna be a great day.

Yay.I don't feel so confused now.HAHA.

A day with a few words from you all feels so solid.
I smile because of all I learnt today.
I smile because of the pettiness of the things we talk about.
I smile because this means we can still appreciate
All the little things in life.
=)
Won't you smile with me?